River Day

 

Pictures from our latest trip to the river (I know the last one is blurry but I just love it so much anyway). Last year’s sweater is a bit short in the sleeves now but that’s actually perfect for playing in the sand water and I’m excited to get some more use out of it. This sweater is definitely one of my favorite hand-knits ever.

Autumn

It is finally starting to feel like fall around here with temperatures down in the low 60s during the day and even some rain, ending our record braking dry streak. We had a wonderful summer of endless sunny days, but it is so refreshing to have cool air and rainy afternoons again.

I am so excited for Halloween as K understands holidays now and will be able to do some trick-or-treating this year, but I still don’t know what her costume will be. It is extra tricky since it needs to be easily layer able with tights/pants/coat/etc, cannot rely on something on her head since hats hoods and headbands are very hit and miss, and can’t be bulky/constraining. I have a few ideas but am still waiting to get started as her language is expanding so quickly now she may tell me what she wants to be.

We have been getting into the Halloween spirit with Curious George’s Boo Fest and Room on the Broom on Netflix. The Netflix version of Room on the Broom is so sweet and perfect, I might actually love it more than K does. Curious George wins every time so that’s an easy one – she has started walking around yelling “Boo!” at people and putting her hands up like a little cat about to pounce while she does and it is so sweet.

Glacier

We just got back from four days in Montana for a friend’s wedding – it was absolutely beautiful and we both wished we could have stayed longer. We drove, which I was pretty nervous about since K hates the car but we got up at 4am to leave by 4:30 on the way out to maximize sleeping in the car, and brought a bunch of fun snacks she doesn’t normally get, the tablet, DVD player and all three Curious George movies. The drive was about 9.5 hours (11 hour travel day including stops) and went better than expected (although there was definitely some crying in there).

We shared a house with G’s parents, brother, SIL and their 4 month old boy and it was great getting some family time between trips out and wedding festivities. We were just two miles from the West Glacier park entrance, but Going to the Sun road (and the most iconic part of the park with the rainbow rocks) was closed for forest fires sadly.

On the second day, we drove around to the east entrance to explore the open side of the park which was beautiful preview of winter, with snow falling and inches on the trees (but not the road thankfully). We saw many magpies, two grizzly bears (from afar), deer, antelope and approximately 2 million black cows (many loose and wandering along the side of the road).

The wedding was absolutely perfect. I sadly don’t have many pictures since I was busy chasing around a certain two year old tornado, and because for privacy I don’t post pics of others, but it was a perfect day for them as the smoky weather cleared and the whole afternoon was sunny and warm. I’m crazy about their cake, and the setting, ceremony and dress were all exquisite.

Home

It’s amazing how fluidly life fills with minutia and magnitude, family, friends, outings, days home, trips to the store and shared naps because we have both just worn each other out. Each moment bleeds into the next and days flow past. Even as some many of these days are so damn long, they are simultaneously fleeting, in the constant oxymoronic state of life around a toddler.

Being home is altogether a different pace and saturation of life from working. I think I had, in many ways, gotten used to life lived like a story told – just the action shots, none of the “filler” – and if that sounds romanticized it really is not. We used to rush all the time. Rush to get up, rush into the car, with the kid crying and hungry because she didn’t want her breakfast options and now we’re late and can’t come up with new options so sorry but you’ll have to eat when we drop you off, rush to work in traffic, oh the worst traffic, rush to answer all the emails, prepare for the day’s deployment calls and internal meetings, rush to fit 10 hours of work into an 8 hour day because staying late meant never seeing my kid but scaling back was never something I could let myself do. Rush to pick her up, rush back home, rush to get food ready, and maybe have a bath but maybe just change into PJs and have a book or two before bed and then an early bedtime because at that point we were all tired and cranky and fussy. Even as those small moments in the evening were mostly what I was working for, honestly, a lot of them sucked. I don’t blame the job, but the 3-4 hour a day commute was a problem – future jobs will need to be closer to home.

I loved working, I really did, and I will have a career again, but while there are days I miss it, I am so grateful for the ability to take some time to soak in these small moments and just be present with myself and my family. Life now is like unfurling my toes into the sand and having nowhere to be, and no reason to keep dirt off my jeans, just small moments to spend with my small one. I won’t say one is easier, working or staying home, because they each presents such different benefits and challenges, and I firmly believe that anyone who says staying home with a kid is easy should try it out. But being here for all of life, being able to focus on helping her with language and fine motor skills, trying out new ideas for preschool at home, and seeking new adventures at the park, is golden and I am so grateful for it.

(above: playing with Grimms waves, seaweed at the beach, little eclipse crescents (they were so cool!), and the sweetest little tornado I know.)